I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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