I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
