What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Randomize
