dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
