what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
