I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I need to sanitize my soul.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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