don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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