her vagine was all disorganized.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Randomize