Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
he puts the penis in happiness.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
