next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
i now understand why vodka
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize