I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
