the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize