your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize