you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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