I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
