I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
