You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
