so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
