Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
