let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
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I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
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I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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