Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
