wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
