Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
