At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize