The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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