Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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