I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
