weddingsv make me drug and hornr
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
