i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
