Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize