My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
