You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought