The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
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I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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