Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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