the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
