the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
