we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
The adults are the big ones right?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize