so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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