physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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