I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
