Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
that is very illegal...i love you.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
