I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
