Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize