You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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