lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize