Having a random hookup so left but love u
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
