She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
