Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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