Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
