the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
