My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize