hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
